♥Baby , our love is inevitable.

*Saturday, June 02, 2007 *♥

Vintage}

its not that lexine .
why should ii start acting like a sistar before yer do ?
yer are the eldest !
ii know mummy crys about us and stuffs .
yer think ii am asleep is it ?
when ii make mummy sad or even sean and yer .
ii cry too .
no one knows right ?
yer obviously love yer fwens more then yer love me .
yes maybe yer do love the family but obviously not me .
ii know yer get scolding too .

being a sistarr isnt about paying bills and all okayes !
being a sistarr is to share our laughter and tears .
where were you when ii needed yer most ?
helping some other fwen ?
when yer needed help and soo did my fwen .
ii tried to help yer first instead of my fwen .
but after that ?
ii get nothing but scolding too .
dun yer think yer're abit too much ?
when ii needed someone there to listen .
yer scolded me instead .
ii wasnt looking fer that !
couldnt yer just give me a hug and say everything would be okay ?
even if yer knew it wouldnt be .
ii aint as strong as ii appear to be alright .
ii guess it'll be too much to ask from yer even fer a hug .
wat ahh lian all ?
ii aint okaye .
see ?
yer dun even know me inside .
soo yer just go around saying wat ii appear to be !
ii rather be yer fwen then yer sistarr if thats mean getting love from you .
ii dunno why the hell am ii soo bloody sensitive about wat yer prospective of me is .
it just makes me mad !
gosh .

ii will study hard .
ii will try .
of course ii wun wanna disappoint mummy or myself .
but do yer think thats easy ?
it not alright .
ii seriously dunnno larr.
yer think ii wanna fight withh yer all the time arhs ?
how many times compared to me did yer help me ?
5 out of 10 ?
all yer care about is mummy , sean and yer fwens .
maybe even daddy .
but never once did yer care yer had a sistarr right ?
maybe yer cared .
but just din have trust and all right ?
ii just dun get yer prob .
ii always try and understand yer .
but it always fails cause yer never let me in .

well .
ii give up trying too .
cause ii am the one getting hurt .
ii just wan a family who loves me .
is that soo hard ?
if it is , ii am sorry fer asking .
ii wun ask le .
ii'll not be soo attached to yer ppl anymore .
ii dunwan to be a nuisance to my fwens too .
ii dunwan to be a burden to anyone anymore .
ii'll just do my own stuffs from now on .
as wat daddy would say , no contact with fwens .
its a good thing my phone is cut now .
ii get to rest more , no money involved too .
go to school , come home study and sleep .
that'll be my routine .
the less fwens , the better .
ii'll be a living zombie .

and yeah .
ii told yer .
ii did it out of spite too .
its alright if yer dun understand .
yer never did .
and yer would never wan too .
ii guess its alright .
yer daddy mummy and sean .
ii'm the black sheep of the family .
the one who gives EVERYONE problems .
ii am really sorry .
ii'll try my best and not disturb anyone anymore .
ii guess it'll be easier .

and leslie**
I'm sittin' here all by myself
just tryin' to think of something to do
Tryin' to think of something, anything
just to keep me from thinking of you
But you know it's not working out
'cause you're all that's on my mind
One thought of you is all it takes
to leave the rest of the world behind
Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back/but I know you did
I'm sittin' here tryin' to convince myself
that you're not the one for me
But the more I think, the less I believe it
and the more I want you here with me
You know the holidays are coming up
I don't want to spend them alone
Memories of Christmas time with you
will just kill me if I'm on my own, oh
Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back
I know it's not the smartest thing to do
we just can't seem to get it right
But what I wouldn't give to have one more chance tonight (one more chance tonight)
I'm sittin' here tryin' to entertain myself with this old guitar
But with all my inspiration gone it's not gettin' me very far
I look around my room and everything I see reminds me of you
Oh please, baby won't you take my hand
we've got nothing left to prove
Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back, but I know you did
And I didn't mean to meet you then we were just kids
And I didn't mean to give you chills the way that I kiss
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back but I know you did
Don't say you didn't love me back 'cause you know you did
No, you didn't mean to love me back
But you did

(this will always be OUR song (: )

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Saturday, June 02, 2007